Sharing 365 life lessons, tips, or hacks; the things that make life easier, happier, and more productive. I hope you’ll follow along and find them helpful too.
Hone Your Good Manners
Good manners are defined as polite or well-bred social behavior. My mother used to call them “social graces” and my grandmother preached “you don’t have to have money to have good manners”. Simple things such as saying “please” and “thank you”, not interrupting people, not demanding attention, asking permission, and knocking before entering are the most basic manners that are recommended we teach our children.
There are others.
Emily Post was the Queen of manners, also known as etiquette. For more than fifty years, she taught the ‘average person’ how to behave within traditional and acceptable social parameters. Most of her advice is still valid but there are other graces she couldn’t have imagined; cell phone manners as an example. The Post family has maintained the work of their matriarch at emilypost.com and outline good manners in business, for weddings, and lifestyle.
Awareness of Others
On their website, they describe good manners as “as sensitive awareness of the feelings of others” and I couldn’t agree more about this as a guiding principle when it comes to considering how to behave. Some manners are formal (not sitting at the table before the host sits) but others are simply common sense if we are considering the people around us (not farting at the dinner table).
I often hear older people speak to the fact that younger generations haven’t upheld familiar manner standards. Frequently, they are talking about ‘thank you notes’ and the absence or neglect of younger people sending them. Everyone wants acknowledgement and appreciation and so when we receive a gift and/or a benefit from someone, a thank you is the least of the considerations and “awareness of the feelings of others”. Today, it is acceptable to send an email instead of snail mail.
Some Things Stay the Same
When parts of our culture change, some elements of manners will change but others continue on with adaptations. It was never courteous to jump up and answer the telephone when it was attached to the wall if you were in the middle of communicating with someone else. The same courtesy remains even though the phones are no longer attached to the wall. If you are engaged with someone, turning your attention to a cell phone is simply rude.
Good manners used to designate social class but they certainly don’t have to. Behavior is a choice and the classification of manners is available online and in library books, free of charge. There is no excuse, or reason that basic manners can’t be observed so take a look and make an honest assessment of your own behavior. If it can use more sensitivity and awareness of the feelings of others it may be time to…
Hone your good manners.
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